Tags
In the movie « When Harry Met Sally…» there’s this really famous scene, where Sally is really enjoying herself while she’s having a sandwich in a diner. Having observed the scene, a women at a nearby table says to the waitress « I’ll have what she’s having », pointing to Sally.
That scene is a great metaphor for the way the world looks to us: you see someone having a great experience, and you see that they have certain circumstances. So you make the understandable mistake of assuming there is a causal link between the two. And you know what, there isn’t. Ever. That’s not how life works.
Our experience doesn’t come from circumstances, it is internally generated. That’s why it is possible to be young, hot, rich, successful and depressed. But that’s also why it is possible to be old, sick, poor and happy. Find your satisfaction, joy and passion inside of yourself and then bring it to everything you do – and you’ll feel satisfied, happy and passionate about everything you do.
When you see people who really enjoy their life, their partner, their job, their travels, their place, it’s very tempting to think « If only I had their circumstances, I would enjoy life too. » But the truth is, if you swapped circumstances, you would still feel like you do (generally) and they would feel like they do (generally speaking), unless something in your understanding shifted along with your circumstances. The reason why they’re enjoying their lives, is not that their circumstances are better or superior, it’s just that they have a higher capacity to enjoy life in the moment. And this capacity for enjoyment is a result of understanding how life really works.
The good news is: anyone can learn to increase their capacity for enjoyment. Our default setting is wall to wall enjoyment. We all have it in us, it’s our nature. And we can all have a learning curve about it and discover our capacity to enjoy life indiscriminately, like children do.
And in the end you CAN have what she’s having, which is not a certain set of circumstances, but a great EXPERIENCE of life!
My question for you is: Does this sound familiar? Do you personally know someone with a very high capacity to enjoy life? Can you see that this has nothing to do with circumstance? What can you learn from this person?
Was this blogpost helpful for you? I would love to hear your reactions!
Looking forward to hearing from you,
Love,
Véronique
It’s much easier to navigate life when we understand how stuff works. My work as a Three Principles coach consists of exploring with my clients « how life really works » and what is true for all human beings. Does this resonate with you? Do you want to know more? Contact me and we’ll have a chat. Looking forward to hearing from you !
Véronique Pivetta 